Let's get things clear.. that picture does not really do this card justice.. so you'll just have to vividly imagine the rest.. Needless to say This years theme was cheesy film style bad break up... cue faux mirror effect and shock red lippy (if you were to accuse me of both a deranged imagination and sense of humour, I may be probably guilty as charged). My reasoning for the theme was as follows: This was a card for my friend Phil of Toluene/III/Biz Baz Boz fame and with previous years of audacious designs (many of which to be showcased on future weeks) I felt I had to keep the theme this year suitably mad. In-case you were wondering, i do not own my own lipstick... I'll leave it to your own musing to work out where this may have come from.
The mirror effect was achieved with backing glued tin foil onto a cardboard record mailer, flattening (as pictured in the making frame above) - clinical Microbiolgoy manual mandatory, prit-stick, more bloody prit-stick, gluing a half cut HD plastic record sleeve and finally slicing to a mirror shape. Steamed heartbreak-in-the-morning touchup effects generate by YET MORE prit-stick and blobs of dried nail polish (clear) for convincing water droplet effect- yet more artistic uses for womens' cosmetics, I should make a book. Then crack realism into the 21st century, by adding ultra-realistic Birthday-Smellotastic-funkology (c) (patent pending). As a trade secret this involves making the card smell like it's desired setting so that it is the first whiff the poor soul gets when opening the envelope. In this case tootpaste lovingly smeared on the front and a few sprays of cedarwood moth repellent spray gave that oh so dank-humid long shower in the bathroom morning-esque aroma. Hopefully, this nuance was achieved when Phil opened the card.
I didn't want to be tooooo outlandinsh with the message... thoughts of " Happy M*therf***ing birthday..." crossed my mind... but... just about... seemed a little too much... (damn... writing that makes me think I should have now.) Instead it reads the classic "Phil, Have a fantastic B-DAY") which is not a pun on a french bathroom utility (bidet). But as a nice side note, I decided to put the classic line of any awkward shower break up about the finer succinct rules of pet ownership (often a troubling matter at these times) keeping it nicely on theme... Hey, at least it didn't say car keys, vintage Gonk troll collection or Gibson EB (or Mini-nova...(http://global.novationmusic.com/hardware-synths/mininova)) could be far worse, right?
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